Where the ?

A very smart suited businessman stands in the arrivals area of the airport, carrying his clean pressed bags of belongings, this is his first time on the island of Al Amarja.  He gets handed a leaflet as he walks towards the exit to the airport, it reads ‘No Firearms allowed, except for the president’s police enforcers’, these words being repeated several times and underlined numerous times, he looks back at the guy who handed him the leaflet noticing that the guy has a large spliff in the corner of his mouth.

As he steps out in to the streets of the island, a slight smell of weed permeates the air, Harleys rumble by with their riders bouncing along on the seat, their naked butt visible as they bounce up and down.  Spotting an ATM machine, the businessman heads on over to it, and as he approaches it, coming out from under the airport building, he comes over all dizzy as he looks up noticing a building the size of and shaped like a pyramid but upside down, the  long base touching the sky.

The ATM blinking seductively in the corner of the businessman’s eye pulls him back to himself, so carries on over to it, a dog walks by urinating with both of its genitals as it walks past the wall the ATM machine is on.  The businessman puts his card in the machine, checking his balance and selecting the withdraw option.  With this the ATM machine responds with a vocal reply, ‘first feed me that dog’.  He turns to look at where the dog had gone, seeing it still slowly walking down the street, rank faeces exiting all over the path as it goes.

As the businessman walks up to the dog, both tails wag excitedly, he bends over and picks the dog up.  Once the dog gets lifted up from the path it starts to excrete matter from all orifices, the businessman quickly hold it away at arm’s length.  The dog is pressed up against the ATM machine and the cash opening opens wide sucking the dog within, hearing the mechanism whirring away.  The platinum colored plastic card eventual gets ejected from the machine, which the businessman thankfully takes, and the whirring starts up again, then the cash opening ejects the two hundred dollars that was requested.
An attractive young looking blonde lady, wearing a trench coat, small heels, and seeing naked legs going up to the bottom of the coat, she seats at the ferry port awaiting for over an hour now to be permit on to the island of Al Amarja.  A young woman in a uniform who had sat opposite her for nearly an hour now eventually stands up and starts to let passengers through, stamping the visitor cards.

As the blonde in the trench coat walks up on to the main street, a gang of very young youths in suits, shave marks visible on faces that are too young to shave, one walks by waving his fist in the air shouting ‘John’s got a stiffy, want to come see it!’  The blonde ignores the shouts, not battering an eyelid at the sight, but instead looks up at the building the greets her, a large upside down pyramid.  A woman slides up the street bundling in to the blonde knocking her, ‘sorry, sorry.  You seem to have dropped this, here.’  The woman picks up a broadsword and puts the pummel of it in to the blondes hand, the woman is covered in a lot of tattoos, nearly all her visible skin is covered.  Quick as you like, as if it is a natural occurrence, the blonde places the sword in to the folds of her trench coat.

The ATM machine carries on blinking seductively behind the businessman, ‘you should go with that woman, she will lead you to where you need to go.’  He turns and spots a blonde place a long blade in to her trench coat, ‘perhaps the next time you could bring me a cat.’  The ATM coos after the businessman as he walks away and heads over to the blonde in the trench coat.  As he walks over he checks over himself to see if he has all his belongings, his bags, his chefs tools, his pressed suits are all okay, and his supply of business cards.

The businessman walks up to the blonde and introduces himself as Adrian, handing her a very flash, stylish business card, it has a gold leaf trim, the text states him as a financial advisor, his name trimmed around the edge with silver, and it appears to be all printed on a silk paper and then laminated.  The blonde takes the card from Adrian not saying anything just looks at the card, a guy in jeans with the fly undone and a sausage hanging out of it on a string stops near to them and starts to graffiti the wall. “This is weather the cuckoo likes”, after finishing the statement the guy hails one of the beat up cheap taxi and asks to be taken to the Flower district, the driver of the taxi in a deep voice confirms the destination, difficult to tell if the driver is of the male or female persuasion, then the driver off.

Adrian suggests that they go for a drive, looking towards the departing vehicle, and begins to hail one of the beat up taxis too. ‘Are you sure?’ the blonde suggests looking down at Adrian’s business card turning it over and over again in pretend study, ‘ah, good point.’  Adrian then hails one of the more up market taxis, a limousine.  As they climb in to the waiting vehicle Adrian tells him to go to the Flower district, ‘and step on it.’  The driver asks if they would like his High Speed Service, after agreement he radios in to the office of the pending service.  Looking down the street other taxis can be seen pulling over and up to other road routes, blocking of any other traffic as the limousine speeds off down a calmer road.  They soon quickly pass by the other taxi with the graffiti guy within.

Upon reaching their destination Adrian starts to rifle through his briefcase and papers looking for something as he takes a look out of the window every now and again, the driver explains about his services and charges, that he is called Brian and if they need any further assistance then to give him a call.  Adrian spots the graffiti guy leave the taxi and enter a bar called “Sad Mary’s Bar & Girl”, ‘ah right there it is, okay I think this is the correct place, thank you Brian.’  Adrian pays the driver with his platinum plastic, $350 fair paid, then steps out on to the plaza, the blonde following suit, a statue of Lady Justice can be seen in the center of the plaza.

Heavy red velvet curtains are drawn aside as the pair, Adrian and the blonde enter the bar only to be greeted by a warped scene of over indulgence, no matter where they look they witness debauchery taking place of some kind or other.  A waitress walks over to their table asking what drink they want, the blonde asks for a pint of milk with a dash of whisky, while Adrian asks for a G & T.

‘So why did you come to this island? Where are you staying?’  Adrian inquires of his blonde companion, still not finding out her name!  As she begins to state that she heard that this was an interesting place that she may like to visit, and that she has not got a place to stay sorted out, Adrian notices the graffiti guy was talking to a smarter dressed guy, when he stands up and heads off in to the toilets, the door of which has a very “interesting” sign on it for the gents, a severed male genitals nailed to the door, it doesn’t bare thinking of what must be on the female toilets or how they would have got it there.  Adrian excuses himself from the blonde telling her that he wishes to freshen himself up at the WC, and heads off towards the toilets.

The guy that scrawled graffiti on the wall was now stood in front of a porcelain bowl, holding two sausages in hand pissing in to the open mouth of the bowl.  Adrian enters and walks up to the wash area, placing his bags on the side, walks up to the guy reaching in to his back pocket, as he draws near he pulls out a fishing wire out of the pocket, holding tight to one end as he swings the other around the guys neck, quickly catching the end as it swings back around.  Unfortunately the cord catch the guys spray cans bursting one as the spray explodes out everywhere, and luckily giving the guy a chance to tuck his head out away from the wire.  Verbal expletives burst out of the guys mouth crashing against Adrian ears, as Adrian pulls out a long thin stiletto.  Pressing the tip of the weapon against graffiti guys breast, Adrian begins to question him trying to get some answers, one of the guys spray cans is positioned just in the way again, preventing Adrian from being able to apply enough pressure to the weapons tip.  Slowly twisting and dragging the tip, like a lovers caress, Adrian presses the stiletto in under the breast plate of the guy, puncturing the heart.  As the stiletto is pulled back out blood sprays out, some of this red claret splatter on to Adrian’s white starched shirt and dark blue jacket. After dragging the body to one of the cubicles, Adrian locks the door and climbs back out over the partition, goes through his bag for a fresh shirt and jacket, washes his hands and face, dresses and checks his style in the reflection brushing an eyebrow down with a licked little finger.

A rough looking guy walks over to the blonde in the trench coat, sat on her own at a table, offering her a jelly baby from a bag he holds towards her, she takes out a white jellied sweet in the shape of a baby.  ‘Seen anything unusual?’ he asks her, and after receiving a negative offers her another jelly baby, this time there appears to be a few more different coloured one within, she takes out a black one and he suggests that the blues are good, so she takes one of them too informing him that she will keep it for later, ‘thank you’.  He walks off.

After some time Adrian comes back from the toilets, ‘you must have needed that’ the blonde offers.  As they talk she tells him that she would like to go see a little sight seeing, then notices briefly that Adrian seems to have spoken with a forked tongue, no sooner had she spotted it than it had gone again.  She starts to babble to herself under her breath, then finally tells Adrian that she had better use the toilets before they go.

The blonde walks up to a door that has a pair of fake breast nailed to the door, Adrian watches her walk away and then notices some dirt under his nail, she quickly turns and walks straight in to the male toilets, Adrian looks back up to find that she has gone and sits there to await for her return.

The blonde has the male toilets to herself, and she takes a look around finding nothing, she does spot the locked cubicle, checking under the door seeing a pair of feet and legs but no movement, no sound in fact at all coming from within, so she enters an adjoining cubicle, puts the seat cover down and stand on the toilet peering over the partition.  As she looks over she can she the graffiti guy slouched on the toilet not moving, she pulls out her sword and reaches it over to tap him on the side of the head, as she does so the head lulls to the side shifting his posture giving her the chance to spot the blood mark in his chest.  The guy is dead, clean dead.

Back at the table the blonde walks over to Adrian asking him if he is ready to leave, as she does so the waitress walks up and hands her a note ‘the jelly baby guy left you this, he left me something more but that is mine!’  The note informs her that it may be a good idea to take a look at The Temple of Devine Experience, and to find Officer John Black.  Adrian bends down to check his shoes laces and at the same time he checks that his stiletto is safely hidden away, from this angle he notices that there is something funny about this blonde in the trench coat, something to do with the light and shadow, but he can’t put his finger on it.

Outside they call on the taxi service of Brian, and ask him to take them to see The Temple of the Devine Experience, he asks if they would like the High Speed Service, but they decline his offer.  On their journey they see that they are a lot of people wearing Hawaiian shirts with nooses as ties.

At the destination a mix of different people can be seen moving about, there are some who are wearing an old type of friars brown robes but with blades all over the material, another guy is carrying a massive hammer slung over his shoulder, people of different religions all standing about in silent prayer others walking over to a guy in the corner giving communion.

‘How about we take a look over there’, the blonde gestures towards the guy giving communion and heads on over, Adrian following along.  The guy can be seen to have about five metal studs in his forehead, all arranged in to an inverted cross, and as he gives communion he dips in to a bag within the insides of his coat.  As Adrian draws near he comes face to face with the business end of a gun, pointed straight between his eyes.  ‘You can’t come any closer! What is your business here?’ the officer commands in an agitated manner, becoming more worked up and aggressive as he gets in to Adrian’s face demanding answers and not really listening.

The blonde in the trench coat walks up calmly to the officer, and begins to talk soothingly to him, calming his anger down, pacifying him, as she does so an aura can start being seen around he, like an inner glow radiates out extinguishing the police officers fire and rage, but in doing so draw attention from all around, everyone goes quiet and looks her way.

A woman in robes that could be seen earlier talking with a few of the police officers, who seems to have some authority over the law enforcers has stopped looking at the blonde and begins to walk over, Adrian can now see that the way in to the temple seems to be wide open and forgotten for now what with his everyone turned in the blonde’s direction.  Seeing this the blonde suddenly unfolds angelic wings from her back, that could not be seen before, and starts to rise in to the air, hovering about ten feet above the ground.  After what seems like a long time, but was only a few seconds, the angel in the center of everyone’s attention suddenly darts over everyone’s heads, and shoots in to the temple vanishing within the folds of the building.

A patch of old dried and dusty dirty has been excavated, and around this is a black and yellow police tape cordening the area off, with the words “do not enter” along the tape repeatedly, here and there can be seen some crude graffiti with just the simple words “fuck you pigs”.  Within the excavation site can be seen a single object, the object being an old, probably 200 to 500 year old corpse, with a modern day police uniform on, and an MP5 gun laying near to it, and a few spent shell casings.

As Adrian manages to get to the cordoned off area within the temple, he finds the blonde finally descend back to the ground looking down at the excavation site.  They both just stand there for a few seconds just looking down at this strange sight, before taking a closer look.  The name badge still on the uniform says “Officer John Black”, and scratched in the solid ground near his body is the words “beware the angels”.  Just then they turn to find the robed woman walking up behind them.

‘That was very impressive my dear, Angela is it?  But it may have been a little stupid, or not as the case may be’, the robed woman directs her statement to the blonde in the trench coat that had showed an angelic nature.  She then explains that her spiritual mother, the President, will needs to know for sure whether Angela is what she appears or not, explaining that she has to do this to ascertain any threats good or otherwise for the President, ‘I will require to touch you to know you more’.  Angela denies her request for now, and that this matter with the officer here is more important, as she points down to the excavated body.

So the robed woman regrets Angela decision, letting them know that they will have about twenty four hours before they will have to leave the island for good, and that she sill stall the process for as long as she can.  After which she finally explains about the situation with the officer, he was investigating a riot that had gone down with the “Pubes” in the Justice district, when all of a sudden he had disappeared, and now he has been found here, an ancient corpse.

Upon leaving the temple as discreetly as possible, so as not to draw anymore attention to themselves, Adrian and Angela walk out to see that everything is going on as before, there are still many people praying, perhaps more than last time, while others are going to “communion” in the corner, the police are still in force, stationed around the complex, one of which seems to be having problems with an odd large blue box type of small building, their eyes do not linger long upon this and is soon forgotten.  They call upon the services of Brian the Taxi driver again, instructing him to take them to the Justice district.

On the journey down to the Justice district, Brian checks whether they really want to go to that area, he could happily drop them off near to there if they preferred, but they reassure him that it is where they would like to go.  Giving Brian the exact coordinate that the robed woman had given them, of where Officer John Black had disappeared.

As they walk down the alleyway, seeing the squad of police in riot gear slowly pushing the “Pubes” back, Adrian and Angela decide to turn and head in the opposite direction, when they hear a familiar voice, coming from the direction they have turned to face.  While walking in the new direction they notice a piece of folded paper laying on the ground, Adrian bends down to pick it up, and while doing this notices that Angela is not actually walking on the ground, but instead is walking a few millimetres above.  Unfolding the paper four times, Adrian reads out the message within, ‘ seekers of angels summers day found to be short fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck’, they both look down at this strange message in Adrian’s hand.

One of the young lads from the “Pubes” gang manages to get behind the police line, and forces his legs to take him away down the alley and away from the police as quickly as he can, unfortunately for him he stumbles upon Adrian and Angela who put an abrupt halt to his flight, and they begin to question him about the poor office who had disappeared.

The lad explains that a guy called Haiku, who is one of the “Cut ups”, had asked him and a few of the other “Pubes” to lead the police officer to a certain location, leading them to a nearby alleyway, he started to look frightened and carried on explaining that suddenly some angels appeared on the roof tops, you could see their wings, and they started to reach out, but that is all he knows as he fled after this not wanted to hang around.

Adrian and Angela easily persuade the lad to take them to where Haiku would be, and he leads them to an area with just a trap down in the ground, he points down towards the closed entrance.  Adrian manages to force open the trap door, and leaving the lad behind, both he and Angela descend in to the Cut up’s crib.

The room they find themselves in is rather dim and dull with a low ceiling, there is a lot of graffiti spread on the wall, “this is the weather the cuckoo likes the weather of the mind”, and there is a guy stood by a machine busy shredding a lot of what looks like paper and saying to himself, ‘I have done what you wanted!’  As their eyes become accustom to the gloom lighting from the one solitary candle, they can make out that the guy is shredding the covers of DVDs, and there appears to be many stone statues in the shadows.

Angela walks up behind the guy and gently rests her hand on his shoulder, quietly reassuring him that everything will be okay, and she flare up an angelic light emitting from herself, brightening up the room.  They are sure they have just noticed that the statues seem to be closer than they thought before.  Suddenly the guys arm turns to granite and begins to strangle himself, quickly Angela pulls out the sword from her trench coat, and all in one fluid motion, severs the guys arm and then the sword is back within her coat.

They can see many DVD covers have been shredded already, the last one the guy had just put through was called “Dracula”, the guy now laying on the floor bleeding profusely from his severed arm.  A bat flies in to the room, going directly to the shadows that are left in the room at the back, and looks like it just transformed in to a human shape.  Looking at the pile of shredded paper there are still some covers that can be partially made out, with titles visible such as “Dr. Who” and “Hannibal”.

Again the statues have moved closer, every blink that comes the statues draw closer, one of them is meer centimetres away from Angela.  They both just stare at the statues, not daring to blink but their minds encouraging them even more to do so, they waste time trying to come up with a plan of action, their eyes drying even more.


A stone hand is now clasped around the throat of Angela, and more statues have moved in nearer to them both, one getting dangerously close to Adrian now.  Muscles in the eye lids twitching with the urge to close and ease the dryness.  ‘How about getting that shredder, and trying it on with these statues?’  Angela suggests, ‘or we could just destroy the shredder’, Adrian throws out the suggestion, ‘okay but it will be worth trying to force the shredder against the statue first, otherwise there will not be one try with after it has been destroyed’, Angela states, a slight desperation in her voice.

Their eyes start to feel like a savannah that has not had any rain for a year, they desperately keep their eyes focused on the statues, trying to keep as many as possible in each of their line of sight.  Slowly Adrian reaches down and behind him to try and locate the machine, while Angela stares in to the stone face of the statue with its hand around her throat, taking in as much of the room as she can, her eyes starting to scream out at her to blink.  Adrian feels the machine in his hand and as he gets a strong grip on it and pull it around, forcing towards the statue in front of him.


Angela finds herself still standing there, her eyes aching and finding difficulty to focus, aware that she is alone in the room apart from a guy on the floor bleeding from a missing arm.

One thought on “Where the ?

  1. More like ‘What the’?
    A dog with two willy’s.
    Who worked all this out,it is a complete web of intrigue.
    Did the atm machine that ate the dog belong to Barklays?
    Must have been difficult to play the game and make notes at the same time.
    Good read.

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