We’re All Going To The Warzone

Only War – RPG/TRPG Session

Run by Will

Imperial Guards;

Baine Bravith – Jason (jymmijamz)

Father Deimos – Chris (alcoholandaphorisms)

Hans ‘Loki’ Lokisson – Me

Odetta – Tanja

(Write-up by Chris)

Official site


Morning breaks, the sun rising up over the horizon behind the tower the squad have just come from. Before them the Albion scouts, a hunter killer group of Imperial Guard. Weapons lowering as a respectful agreement has been brokered between the two squads

The Albion Sargent chats with Father Deimos, impressed with his guts for walking out in front of their readied weapons.   Deimos briefs him on what they have encountered so far, speaking of the vandalised tombs they have encountered.

“For such an affront they must burn, when will we be ready to go?” Deimos finishes

“Well, we’ve been mopping up around here. Not seen many orks. Good. Means they are concentrated on the battlefield. We’re a good way from there, how did you end up so far off course?”

“We had to deal with an unruly machine spirit” Deimos replies

“Oh” The Sargent thinks for a moment “We have a tech priest with us who can take a look at that. He is pretty good”

“Our drop pod refused to obey “Deimos clarifies”We had to find an alternate exit on the way down”

“I see. Odd, our kit works fine. Well, I’ll call in some transportation for you”

“First you may wish to speak with Lokison. He should be able to advise you on the location of the forces we encountered and what the refugees told us about their encounters.”

The Sarge nods, looking over to where Loki is slouched against a wall at the back. Heading over the Sargent greets him “Loki is it? I hear you have some information on the greenskins”

“Yeah, we ran into a bunch of small greenskins, and their handler” Loki reels off the coordinates of the encounters.

“We’ve seen a lot of the little greenskins like that. Damn menace against our walkers, they are a devil for that. With you lot here we should be able to take care of them”As he talks the Sarge starts marking down the co-ordinates on the map. Loki looks as he does so, the map is in unreadable high gothic, but still he is fairly sure the Sarge is marking the co-ordinates in the wrong place.

“You sure that it shouldn’t be in that region somewhere” Loki points

The Sarge thinks for a moment then smiles “I can see you are well trained in Cartesian geography. Would that be a four degree angle or seventeen degree angle” At the silent response Sarge raises an eyebrow “I’ll just make a note of that ok” He say with a wry grin “Hmm, just remembered I need to radio in from the walker”

As the sergeant moves away hurriedly Loki rolls his eyes and leans back against the wall.

After reporting in on the vox the Sarge grabs a large metal tin and bashes on it repeatedly for everyone’s attention. “All right you lot. Them up at the hill know our situation, they are sending a chimera transport to pick you lot up. We’re going to meeting up with the tank along with the rest of the cavalry. Its going to be a hard forced march, so before we go does anyone need any medical attention?”

“We are well and hungry for the fight” Deimos replies
“Oh, hungry. I’m hungry” The Ogryn Baine says
“Oh, and ignore the Ogryn.” Deimos says, much to Odetta’s amusement as they set off

Half an hour into the trek through the jungle undergrowth Jools looks over to Deimos. “Cor Father, aint there a lot of funny flowers around again?”

The strange fungal outcrops seem to be in great number here, and particularly large growths.
“Yes” Deimos agrees “Foul Xenos fungi. Sargent, do you know if our ships have any anti plant missiles to purge this taint?”

“I have no idea what the ships have. They tend to be reasonably equipped”

“What about your troops then. Do you have any hellhound tanks that would have enough promethium to deal with an infection of this size?”

“How do you know they are linked with the xenos?” Sarge asks

“We saw the fungi around the body of a greenskin we had burned, it was obviously unusual and thus must burn.  Further Lokison observed that the plants seem to be following in the xeno’s wake. If they are not caused by them they are at least close comrades and must be purged.”

“Oh, Lokison said did he” The sarge looks over with amusement and continues sarcasm in his voice “Guess I’ll have to send the hellhounds out then”

During this exchange Baine looks from one plant to the next “Large. Funny xenos plant go bumpy. Do things. Move”

Deimos looks over. There are several barrel shaped and sized protrusions amongst the plant life.  Some up to three feet in height.

“Excuse me. I have a feeling the emperor has a wish for me” He says as he brings the flamer up, stepping over to the growths and squeezing the trigger encasing them in flame.

“BUMPY” Shouts the ogryn in excitement and starts spraying randomly into the area with its massive ripper gun.  Odetta just watched, rolling her eyes as Loki braces his weapon ready. The rest of the Imperial Guard drop to the deck, shocked by the unexpected gunfire.

Squeals rise from the plants as they blacken and blister,inhuman shrieks of pain. Moving closer Deimos uses his inactive chainblade to pry a burning pod open, revealing a creature, green skin and foetal, dead within it. With a grim smile he turns the flamer on the rest is broad waves.

“Sargent. We must contact the hellhounds now. There are xenos within the plants. They should be destroyed on sight lest we are overrun. Loki, bring your flamer and aid me in clearing this muck from the land”

As the Sargent halts, trying to decide what to do, Odetta moves up to one of the pods, and with almost heretically scientific ways tries to find out if it is a host or if the creatures grow within them. Her studies are broken by the sound of scuttling from above in the trees foliage.

Realising how exposed they are with the foliage burnt Deimo bursts for the nearest tree for cover, sliding in behind, flamer braced up towards the movement. Moments pass, with no sign of further activity.
“Jools, put some las rounds into the tree’s canopy” Deimos shouts.

Jools kneels and puts a few rounds through the branches, burnt leaves coming down as the only response. The squad waits, weapons raised, the silence held with their breath.

Suddenly small green things drop from directly above Deimos, snarling spitting things with sharp ears and hooked nose. Swinging his inactive chainsword like a bat Deimos catches one out of the air and sends it bouncing.  Backing off he finds himself faced with three narrowing eyes as the green things bare their teeth at him. Pulling the cord on the chainsword, Deimos smiles as black smoke belches from it with a roar and the blades spin up.

“I commend your zeal xenos, you run to your fate. You know what retched beings you are”

Snapped out of their surprise the rest of the guard fill the air with las blasts and ripper gun fire. Sods of earth and felled trees fill the air, but none find their mark. The greenskins are too close to Deimos for them to get a clean shot. Scrabbling through the fire the green things leap at Deimos, backing off he managed to bat two back, but one lands neatly on his chest, burying its teeth deep into his armour.

Turning the spinning chain blade towards him Deimos grabs the greenskin from his chest and throws it directly onto the blade. The small thing erupts into a shower of gore and bone as it gets caught in the whirling teeth. Screaming in terror the two remaining tiny greenskin flee into the treeline,

Silence falls again. Then comes the thudding. Close and heavy. Coming closer and closer. Tossing trees from in its path. Lokison runs up to opposite Deimo, the two setting up diagonal flamer fire arcs in preparation.  Odetta and Baine bracing their longer ranged weapons behind cover further back.  Baine, bored with waiting, snaps off a shot at where one of the smaller greenskins ran and is rewarded with a  sick squelch of dying for his troubles. Jools keeps close behind Deimos, frag grenade readied. Nearby the Albion scouts wheel around, creating a semi circle of braced fire-power.

Barely are they prepared when a towering beast smashes through the treeline. Muscles and tusks on skin dark green. Hulking even with its hunchbacked gait. An Ork looks with glee at the odd smelling humans set before it. The potential corpses.

The first sheet of flame, released by Lokison, it leaps away from with ease. A single ripper gun round from the volley that Baine released into the air finds its mark, punching a hole through the chest of the fungal beast.

With a roar of glee the xenos raises its giant iron hammer above its head, charging straight past the prepared fortifications towards the Ogryn. The hammer, a mass of iron and stone with enough weight to crush a skull, slams into the ground at the Ogryns side. As the two giant beasts struggle over the control of the hammer Deimos finally gets a sight of the ork through the sights of his flamer. Any blast however will catch the Ogryn as well.

A bonus then.

Fire fills the air, engulfing the two warriors.. Promethium clinging to them and burning the skin from their flesh. Screaming the xenos turns to see who inflicted such pain on it. Lowering his flamer, Deimos draws his chainsword, ready once more.

The thudding of walkers indicate that Albion’s troops are moving into position, wheeling around to get a clean shot at the xenos. Meanwhile Jops and Stoo lay down covering fire while Odetta gets into position to snap some shots off and Loki has time to pull up his las carbine to add more fire into the mix. It is an impressive display of fire-power that destroys trees, rocks and earth, but not a single round finds the xenos. Adding to the confusion is the staggering and screams of the burning Ogryn, his team mate quickly pulling out his wet weather gear and wrapping it around the brute, trying to smother the flames.

Thankfully the ork is doing little better, blinded by the flamer it staggers around, prompting Deimos to retrieve the flamer and pour the fire on once more. The smell of burning fungi fills the air. Finally, Odetta lines up a clean shot ranking the ork with a three round burst that drops it to its knees.

As the ork tries to rise again Deimos approaches, only halting the surge of flame at the last minute to ready the chain sword and cleave the creatures head from its shoulders. The beast stands for several moments, green blood spurting metres into the air. Then, finally it falls dead.
“For the emperor!” Deimos bellows to the sky in triumph.

“Bloody hellfire” the exclamation comes from the Sergeant who watches the ragged penal squad, impressed.

“Here endeth the lesson” Deimos adds with a calm smile.

“Bloody distractions” Sarge says, looking at the carnage

“You see now why we have to burn the xenos fungi?”

“I’m not sure, burning them seems to attract attention” Sarge says thoughtfully

“True, but each one we kill here is one we don’t have to deal with later.  If xenos comes when we do so more the better, I am sure Lokison could arrange some sort of trap for them in advance”

Lokison nods, grenades could be easily rigged to trip wires to deal with approaching hordes.

It takes several more hours forced march to reach their destination, with no further troubles. Concrete structures turned into improvised quarters, cameo gear spread over everything obscuring it from view. Chimera troop transports ready at the edge. Before heading to the transport Baine and Lokison enter a dark room that clearly is the quartermaster store.  A young woman stacking box after box of ammunition in dug out trenches turns to greet them.

With a wink and a smile Lokison asks if they have an cameo gear he can requisition. After a short banter the quartermaster signs one over “Anything else you need mate?”.  Maybe next time” Lokison answers with a lascivious wink.

“Next time, always next time” The quartermaster says, shaking her head “What about you?” She says turning to the Ogryn “You all right there? Looks like you have been in a hell of a fight”

Steam still rising from the evident burn marks the Ogryn shudders “Bad man. Nasty priest man. Burnt me all up”

“Well we can’t be having with that can we, what can I do you for?”

“Bullets. Lots of bullets. Want to kill xenos”

“Not a problem, anything else shorty?”

Shaking his head happily with an armful of ripper rounds the Ogryn heads out again, heading towards the Chimera where the others wait. At the edge of the Chimeria’s loading doors he pauses again. “Dark. Small. Don’t want to”

From inside Deimos pats his flamer, stroking it appreciatively. “Get in abomination” he mutters with a sadistic grin.

Baine pauses, looks to the flamer, then to the hold, then back to the flamer before shuffling in unhappily Jops tries his best to keep the Ogryn calm, talking about it being like the giant spaceship above, but Baine just tenses, remembering the fear and pain of the drop pod.

Sighing the drivers looks back at them “If there is nothing else?”

“We are all here” Deimos replies “Take us to do the emperors work. The main front”

The Chimera sets off, quickly building up speed over the flattened terrain. Rattling around inside the squad can see but little out of the view slots in the tanks side. Instead first they smell the acrid aroma of spent gunpowder and the sticky smoke feel of burnt promethium.  The battle front proper rises up and with it hundreds of hellhound tanks blazing away swaths of land.   Thousands of walkers burning the air with las weapon fire. If front smoke billows out, blocking all view of what comes before. Instead they can see the nearby running of troops and tech priests attending to their duties in the thousands. Many are tossing greenskin blood to the fires, encouraging view blocking smoke to allow their tanks advance

As the Chimera slides to a halt the troops are already moving, spilling out into cover, weapons at the ready.  They are the shock troops, responsible for causing a break point for others to take advantage of and spiriting from cover to cover they approach the burning cloud, to spy what lies beyond

Over  half way through they start to spy what lies beyond. The xenos forces massing. No controlled manoeuvres, just directed anarchy. Drum beats and the clank of metal. Flickers of welding torches and something ahead. Rising from the cloud. Almost a huge wall of metal at first, as the smoke clears it starts to take blasphemous shape.  A statues, a giant mockery of the ork shape, a massive cannon hanging by its side. Greenskin swarm over it, adding pistons and metal sheets, Building it to completion. Already it looks over the men, walkers and even tanks with its enormous size.

Loki just stares at it, before comprehension comes to him and he smiles. Seeing the look Deimos nods

“I think we have found our target. Let us head back to main force and requestion targeting markers for basilisk and air bombardment. Let us blow this blasphemous idol from the face of the planet”

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